Keeping it Real

A patient today came in for his annual physical. We chatted and at some point he said, “You are a good doctor.” I asked, what makes me a good doctor? He said: The last time I was here, you asked me how I had been and I said great. I asked you how you had been and you said; “Well, I’ve been better, I cleaned up puke all weekend, got 6 hours of sleep, and if I have one more bad hair day, I’m going to shoot myself.” After that, I relaxed and was able to tell you why I really wasn’t taking care of myself and my diabetes. My wife was having an affair with my best friend.

I like that guy!

Just keeping it real baby!

Posted on March 31, 2012 by Angela in Uncategorized Leave a comment

Weathering the storm

Today, Dee writes:

I knew when I started my 90-day weight loss challenge that I would have to eventually have to confront uncontrollable outside forces. I didn’t know it would be on Day 4. Yesterday as I was just to leave work, I received three simultaneous phone calls from the three other members of my family.

Caller #1

My oldest teenage daughter was livid after her little sister borrowed (without asking) her brand new Victoria’s Secret bra.

Caller #2

My youngest teenage daughter was crying hysterically because. she loaned the bra to a friend that proceeded to call her a rude bitch.

Caller #3

My husband called to say he was grounding them from their cars for fighting; he was placing all their clothes in the garbage; and was going out to “golf” for the night (AKA drink with buddies at the local beach bar).

That’s only Part one.

Part two involved my plan to tidy up the guest room for a weekend houseguest. I came home and found it carpeted wall to wall in my daughter’s clothes. I then received a text with photos of my father and little brother’s Southern Indiana property after a massive wildfire.

Due to guestroom cleaning demands, I cancelled a meeting with a friend from church who is currently withdrawling from Oxycontin. This was all before 6 pm! Feeling exhausted from cleaning, stressed that my hubby was with bar friends, sad my daughter was bullied, and guilty for not helping my needy friend and brother, I caved and found temporary comfort in beer, chips and chocolate cake. Prior to these outside forces attacking, I had eaten squash, grilled chicken, a banana, and a pineapple-ricemilk smoothie for breakfast.

Note to self: set up a hurricane preparedness plan! Perhaps I’ll put my tennis shoes and shorts on tonight so that when things hit the fan I can walk out the front door for some aerobic relief. The closest liquor store is more than two miles away on foot so I should be safe.

Dear Dee—

I can feel your pain with every word. I’m not surprised that you finally gave in! When I come home to chaos rather than the perfect fantasy of rest and relaxation that I daydream about, I go postal! I will agree that a brisk walk after work does help. I occasionally sneak one in before I even hit the door because I can’t remember the last time I arrived home to peace in the house. Remember, you didn’t make any of those bad choices—they did. You can start fresh tomorrow with a revised attitude of self confidence because you are awesome!

Posted on March 30, 2012 by Angela in Family, Guest Blog, Humor, Mind, Spirit, Uncategorized Leave a comment

Pass the salt!

Contrary to popular belief, I don’t think salt is a bad thing. Actually epsom salts made of magnesium sulfate have great medicinal properties when absorbed through the skin. The biggest benefit is that it helps replete magnesium in the body. This helps with muscle cramping often associated with chronic dehydration (from too much Mtn Dew), works as an anti-inflammatory, and removes dead skin. The biggest benefit is that magnesium helps raise serotonin levels which elevate mood and concentration. With most of the country suffering from adrenal fatigue, we could all use a little elevation in mood. Last but not least, and most important for me, it will help relieve foot odor. I have two children I need to douse in epsom salts baths tonight. The stench radiating from our house is unreal!

Posted on March 29, 2012 by Angela in Diet, Nutrition, Weight Loss, Whole Food 2 Comments

Attack of the 30lb Sumo

A few months ago, after listening to me nag, one of my BFF’s decided to do a cleansing/detox diet to get healthy. She has 4 lovely children, a full time job, and a crazy busy life. Jody is the most fabulous cook and often drops gourmet meals off for us on a whim. I think we have a kindred connection because those are usually the days I am driving home from work thinking I’m too exhausted to cook and will go postal on my family the first time someone asks “When’s dinner?” The girls are all just chomping at the bit to jump away from their phones and computers to lend a hand. NOT! Then I’ll ask for help, they will roll their eyes and then proceed to bicker with each other the entire time. It’s difficult to cook when you are peeling Emma off of Sid’s back when she has attacked like a sumo wrestler. Jody just knows–she should, she’s a mom. She and her sister, Dee, are incredibly creative, whitty, and enjoy life. They have started feeling so much better after changing their diets, they were inspired to share their story.

Let me introduce Jody and Dee’s mission “Food Forethought”

Food For Thought, Food Forethought

We all think about food. Most of us even have emotional experience relating to liking food, disliking food, craving food, loving food. At some point as an adult, we start to think about food based upon how it makes us feel after we’ve eaten it. When dieting, we obsess about everything that’s on the “don’t eat” list. What do you think happens when one tells herself “I can’t have cheesecake, I can’t have cheesecake, I can’t have cheesecake” incessantly? You will likely give your right arm at the end of the day for a piece of cheesecake. The aftermath of guilt and digestive agony is a recurring nightmare.

Here’s our plan: let’s think about food, what we CAN eat, before we eat it. Food is so much fun! If you look at what the earth provides us, rich in color and nutrition and taste, it’s amazing. We want to take a look at healthy and flavorful recipe options that will change your mind, and change your health.

Here’s the interesting part (and the disclaimer): the contributors of this site are not physicians, not nutritionists, and not culinary experts. We are parents, spouses, full-time office workers, neighbors, and friends. We are on this journey with you, adapting common comfort foods for a healthier life.

As we get to know each other, we will share our secrets and successes and we will encourage each other to persist in this journey to better health. We can do this!

Posted on March 28, 2012 by Angela in Body, Diet, Family, Guest Blog, Humor, Nutrition, Weight Loss, Whole Food 1 Comment

Don’t Derail!

Here is Dee’s post for the day. I agree that it looks beautiful. It is so easy to derail on a diet. I do encourage people to take it one day at a time. I may be calling Dee and begging her to accompany me to Tijuana Flats when I have my next nacho craving. I am hoping that she will accept and if she is having a good day–eat something healthy. If not, go ahead and splurge that one time, then not beat her self up about it. We will all probably have a big mac again too! Let’s keep this realistic. We aren’t dieting we are simply trying to make better choices. We will fall off the wagon, then jump back on. Every morning before school, I tell my girls “Make good choices!” They roll their eyes! I think I need to ask them to say it back to me. I’m considering dumping my current love, diet mtn. dew. My goal for tomorrow is to drink one if I crave it, and then not have another until I drink an entire glass of water. Baby steps because I do love my dew! Its been one long torid affair we have had. My Bad Romance!

My biggest questions for Dee are: 1. Were you still hungry? 2. What did it taste like?

Today, I’m off to DSW to find you some hot shoes! The unveiling better be big! I see sequins and stilettos in your future.

Dee writes:

I ate this and lived!

Yesterday I was an experimental vegan. Coconut milk and a banana for breakfast, salad for lunch with lemon juice and this for dinner. It is quite beautiful. I went to a farmer’s market and bought some things — this is spaghetti squash with diced tomato and fresh basil. This is a 180 degree turnaround from what I wanted to eat. I would have normally wanted quesadillas from Tijuana Flats (with cheese and sour cream)…not even close. I will say that I’ve tried a plant-based diet before and went from 200 pounds to 182. At 182, I actually felt skinny. Isn’t that funny? Even though I was far from skinny, I still felt lighter and more mobile. That’s how I know it can be done. I also know the mistakes I’ve made in the past and can hopefully prevent them before they’re repeated. In past pseudo-successful diets, I get to a pretty good point and let down my guard because the diet is “working”. That’s when the sucker punch comes, derails a lot of good effort and knocks me off course. The other thing I remember about starting any diet is that the first few days are the hardest because my body is throwing a tantrum. We come from a German heritage on Dad’s side with a tenacious mom that survived brain surgery, strokes and breast cancer. I’m hoping my beautiful little sister joins me on this blog. It was initially all her idea. (ILY) One more note about veggies: it is one thing that every logical diet/eating plan has in common. I said logical because I don’t count Adkins. Vegetables are high in nutrition, low in calories, low in fat and straight from God’s hands to your mouth. Win, win, win.

Posted on March 28, 2012 by Angela in Uncategorized 1 Comment

“If you build it, they will come”

As you already know if you are visiting this site, we are dedicated to helping people take ownership of disease by inspiring them to change their diets. We post ideas, links and stories of other’s who have succeeded in changing their lives for the better. This site is my “Field of Dreams.” I started this program because I realized that in the future, I will not be able to treat disease because of the sad state of the economy. In 10-20 years, pharmaceuticals and insurance prices will be too high for most of us to afford. Recent studies predict that by the year 2037, Medicare will be bankrupt and insurance premiums will exceed the average American household income. For that reason, I am encouraging all of us to take an active role in disease prevention before our children and grandchildren require medical intervention that they can’t afford and may not be available. I dedicated my career to helping people, took the Hippocratic Oath, and am sticking to it. How can I help patient’s if I don’t treat the cause of their diseases? We are not victims of genetics, we are victims of a fast paced, capitalistic society that has lost priorities. That is why we are all fat, sick, and nearly dead. We don’t have time to nurture our spirits, families and minds. We are too busy trying to get through each day! I strongly believe that physicians need to take back the healthcare industry. We need to lead the revolution to change in the direction of prevention. I have vowed to more actively help patients get the nutritional education and encouragement that they need to change their lifestyles. Other physicians need to be encouraged to defy the rules and standards and take this leap of faith. Political lobbying, insurance dictators, and pharmaceutical advertisements simply aren’t doing the job of cutting healthcare spending.

We do have options: If Kony can go viral overnight via the internet—SO CAN WE!

Share these messages posted on the site with others. More importantly, try to slow down in life, take care of yourself and most of all —just be yourself. Trust me, as I say in my home page, it’s scary, but people will still love you if you aren’t perfect! Just be real.

Posted on March 26, 2012 by Angela in Call to action Leave a comment

Obsession and Compulsion Strike Again!

As most of you know, I tend to be a bit obsessive/compulsive. I am especially bad when I’m overstressed, tired, and when it comes to parenting. I fell asleep on a Friday night after a long week while watching a movie with Sidney. Eek! I woke up still on the couch at 4 am and she had put herself to bed. To most, this wouldn’t be a big deal, but for me, it was a catastrophe. The next morning, crying my eyes, out to Tim; I declared that I was the worst mother ever. Sidney was going to ruin her kids because I was a failure parent; she was headed to delinquency as an unloved preteen; and I would die without having anyone to pluck the black hairs off my chin in the nursing home. He cracked up and called me a nutjob. “She’s 12, whats the big deal?” Great! World’s worst mom and nutjob wife who was obviously unloved because he clearly didn’t recognize the anguish I was experiencing.

Here is a little trick I have recently learned that has really changed my life (thank you Kim!)

She said, “When you walk into the grocery store with baby puke on your shirt, bunny slippers on and your hair a mess; What crosses your mind when see a patient of yours in Aisle 10?” I replied, I think SHIT, I gotta get outta here because if they see me they are going to think I am either psychotic or strung out on heroin!

Then she told me about cognitive distortions. When people with obsessive compulsive traits (I would say all mom’s) get stressed out and overwhelmed, we tend to distort our thinking and become paranoid. Well I didn’t know what the heck that meant so I had to have her dumb it down.

Black and White Thinking –if your performance falls short of perfection, you think you are a total failure

Catastrophizing Things–exaggerating the importance of something

Mind Reading–arbitrarily concluding that someone is reacting negatively to you

So my grocery scenario proved I was distorting the reality. I was thinking that if someone looked disheveled, they were obviously not ok. I took my disastrous appearance and translated it to “psychotic and on drugs.” Lastly, I assumed that the patient even cared what I looked like! They were probably more worried about moving their candy bars to the bottom of the cart so I couldn’t see their unhealthy choices.

So I went back and rethought my meltdown about being a worthless parent. Not tucking my 12yo into bed one night did not automatically make me a bad mom. It didn’t mean she was going to make bad choices. Actually, she declared me Best Mom Ever for letting her stay up so late!!! And oops, sorry Tim, I guess the 2 hour lecture on how you didn’t love me was a little extreme considering I am a nutjob.

Thank God because I just plucked a black chin hair!

For more information on Cognitive Distortions–Read “The Feeling Good Handbook” by David Burns. And when your next negative emotion enters your mind–ask yourself to rethink the reality of it. Trust me, I do it on a daily and sometimes hourly basis.

Posted on March 26, 2012 by Angela in Family, Humor, Mind, Spirit, Uncategorized 2 Comments

The Myth of Discipline

The Myth Of Discipline

I tried taking a little different approach this week because this article was too good to pass up. I received this from a good friend.(Thanks Ben) Written by world renown strength and condition guru Charles Poliquin, this article hits on the essential points of discipline, priorities, and self-esteem. Give this a quick read for some inspiration in choosing your next meal or getting after your next workout.

“There is no such thing as discipline. There is only love. Love is the most powerful creative force in the universe. You are the result of what you love most. You either love finely etched muscular abs more than donuts or you love donuts more than wash board abs you could do your laundry on. It is as simple as that. Don’t beat yourself up that you have no discipline or further drown yourself in a sea of refined carbs. Admit that you like crappy food more than you love strength. Or ask yourself this, what do you really love? Self-esteem is the reflection of self-judgment. One of the best ways to raise self-esteem is to make truly loving choices that lead to increased strength of body and mind. For example, if you truly love yourself in the gym, you choose the full squat with chains over the leg extension machine. At the restaurant, if you truly love yourself, you pass on the heavenly smelling basket of bread and creamy butter, and ask for some more limes for the water. Limes alkalize your body which in turn helps your bones, muscles and your ability to deal with stress.

When you are faced with difficult choices, ask yourself, in context of course, what would a loving expert recommend? For example, when working chest, would a loving strength coach recommend the pec deck, or full range dumbbell presses. When choosing desserts, would the loving nutritionist recommend a bowl of berries or the triple-decker brownie submerged under melting vanilla ice cream.

How to free yourself from the outdated concept of discipline:

Accept that all your choices are reflections of what you truly love.
Love is the greatest creative force of the Universe. Use it wisely.
Choose to love yourself more than external things.
Treating yourself well accelerates the growth of your self-esteem.
When people comment on your results and say things like “Wow you have a lot discipline” answer “No, I just make loving choices for myself”. Reinforcing your own positive behavior will help you grow in strength.
What you appreciate appreciates. Whenever you make a truly loving choice, say to yourself ‘Thank you for taking care of me in a loving way”. The more you talk to yourself like a loving parent, the faster you will grow. By documenting and rewarding your successes, they will grow in magnitude and frequency. Whenever I meet a goal, I reward myself with positive things like a vacation or a new piece of equipment. When I get something better, I make the choice of giving away the old piece to someone who will appreciate it. Living a clutter free life allows for more growth.
The more you believe in yourself, the more objectively you will be able to take the advice of authority figures.

There is an old Hindu saying: “The World is as we are”. Are you tired of seeing the condition of the world around you? Start by changing yourself- be the change you want to see in the world.

Kevin Deeth is a Notre Dame graduate with a degree in business/marketing who is currently playing professional hockey in Stavanger, Norway. He is also an ISSA certified personal trainer. I would like thank Kevin for his guest post! He is inspirational to us all.

Posted on March 25, 2012 by Angela in Guest Blog, Uncategorized Leave a comment

For Joe and my superhero Amy

Lucy and Ethel or The Lone Ranger and Tonto, never mind the gender…the common denominator is simple: 100% True Friendship. Funny how in life we all can relate to side kicks. My ‘side kick’ happened to be my best friend Joe Griffith : aka “Superman Joey”. Joe was my very best friend in the whole world. I don’t even think our family and friends really understood just how much time we spent together. We could hang out all day and night … return home and still talk for endless hours on the phone till the wee hours of the morning. Joe was my confident,my partner in crime, my side kick Superhero. I knew no matter what circumstance he would be there for me. He was funny,caring, and so full of life. Joe was a devoted son,brother, and friend who volunteered in the community. We shared the love of film,art, and cooking together. He had this gap between his teeth that always bothered him greatly, but to me- it was the one thing that set him apart. It brought out his radiant smile and warm deep brown eyes. He had good morals, strong character, and loved God. When he smiled you could feel his heart full of joy and love. We laughed ,cried , and did just about everything together until I got the call one night that would change my life forever. The phone call that ended up making me a stronger woman in the fight for suicide prevention and awareness. I was supposed to go walking with Joe hours before he took his life. He left me a voice mail asking to do dinner later instead of a walk. I often wonder what if I would of been there to intercept that call – would our conversation at that dinner or on that initial walk made a difference? Why or how did I (his best friend) not see any signs of depression or anxiety? What did I do wrong? Was it my fault? It has been 3 years since Joe’s death – I still find myself asking these questions at times but know I will never have an anwser. I also know I had no control of Joe’s actions. I know survivors of suicide must face and ask these same questions. I can understand that deep pit in their stomach the moment when they hear their loved one is no longer with them. It is in that moment of silence and emptiness we die a little inside ourselves too. We feel empty … our loved one and “sidekick” is gone, forever gone and it is a very lonely feeling that attacks our entire body. After Joe’s death I found a letter I had never read before that he wrote to me. I found it one day in a stack of my favorite dvd’s we had been going through before his death and knew it was his way of telling me he loved me, he was with God…and he was okay. People often told us we were like Superman and Wonder Woman – attatched hip to hip trying to make a difference somehow with or without capes in the community. Whenever I was working on a charity event, I could always count on Joe being my number one supporter. He would participate in walks or help me get wonderful donations. I knew after reading the letter, there were many Superman Joey’s out there in the world who brought joy and love to their friends and family. After Joe’s death I realized my own friends became distant and the stigma of Joe’s suicide was a major part of the battle. I registered for my first Out Of The Darkness Walk and realized there were other survivors who understood exactly what I had been going through. A core group of Joe’s friends walked the first year. It was just what we all needed to get through his tragic death. It opened my eyes to be stronger and understand more the importance of suicide awareness and prevention. Unfortunately, the following year I could not find anyone to walk with me. Friends and family members simply just could not make it. I was stunned and a bit numb. Why wouldn’t anyone take time out to walk for someone who showed so much love to them..or just walk in support for such a huge loss? I heard friends were still angry at Joe and some were ashamed to be associated with suicide. Could it really be because of the stigma associated with suicide? I decided to volunteer and run the merchandise booth that year even if it meant going by myself. I felt so alone that day. I pretty much knew no one, had a huge pit in my stomach, and was missing my best friend terribly. I remember I walked up to the registration tent and was greeted with much love and support from other volunteers and staff. I knew then I was right where God wanted me to be. They say God works in mysterious ways – well he does. I was working the merchandising booth when a survivor came up to me to ask if I had seen the Superman and Wonder Woman? I had no idea what they were talking about and all of a sudden in the middle of a crowd of hundreds I see a red cape flying in the wind. I think to myself – “Out of ALL of the Superheroes …My Superman Joey is here at this walk – Unbelieveable!” I made my way to the people who were dressed in the superhero costumes and explained my situation. Within minutes the man dressed as Superman immediately grabbed and hugged me as he shouted he was walking in honor of Supermen Joey today! Was this real? Was this a sign? It was then at that very moment when I felt that Joe was there in spirit. I was not alone anymore.That feeling of spirit was spread all around the walk that day and it was as if I could feel other survivors celebrating their own loved ones too. Their loved ones may not have been there physically but they were living within us each in our own special ways. In every word, in every song, in everything God creates… their spirits live on. I ended up not being alone that year after all, it was then that I wanted to make sure no one should have to ever walk alone. This year I am very proud to be a committee member of the walk .Our local AFSP Indiana Chapter is also going to have volunteers as ambassadors at The Out Of The Darkness Walk for those who may not have anyone to walk with. I never imagined I would be so passionate and such an advocate for a cause that still has such a strong fight and stigma. I am not a Wonder Woman or a superhero by any means nor was Joe. We were just two best friends, two side kicks who will always have a forever bond and now a message. The message is simple – we all need to keep educating. AFSP has paved the way for us all to speak openly and honestly about suicide prevention and awareness. I lost my best friend, my side kick , my own Superhero to this horrible illness. I never saw the signs. I never dreamed this would happen to me. Most importantly, I never thought this would of happened to Joe. I miss his touch, I miss his voice, I miss that silly gap between his teeth that made his smile so bright. The message is simple: The more we educate others – the more we will continue to make a difference. We must remember that every walk does matter …every voice does speak volumes …and every minute counts.

Posted on March 4, 2012 by Angela in Benevolence, Family, Spirit, Suicide, Uncategorized Leave a comment

“It’s A Boy”

Last week, much to my dismay, my friend was successful in taking my flabby winter thighs to the gym for a pilates class. While doing some breathing exercise in the birthing position, she yelps out “It’s A Boy!” All eyes in the class went immediately to us and I was all to ashamed that I was unable to do 1 sit-up without rolling to the side for a push. I just had a baby, give me a break! Oops! That was four years ago. Okay no more excuses. My friend Bryan offered to post a little advice for those of use breaking back into the exercise routine:

“Literally every system in our bodies is healthier with regular exercise. We should strive to get at least 30-60 minutes of vigorous exercise every day. Other than smoking or other substance abuse, leading a sedentary life is the most unhealthy thing you can do. If that’s not enough incentive, to reduce healthcare costs many employers are creating financial motivation for people to get active, hitting people in their wallets if they refuse to make exercise a priority.

So, keep some things in mind as you begin to exercise routinely:

To burn fat from around the midsection or hips, do NOT focus on exercises that “target” those particular areas…it doesn’t work that way. Working those muscles is good but they will still be covered up by the fat, so have realistic expectations. Fat is stored calories; get rid of it by doing ANY exercises that burn calories effectively.

Perhaps the best exercise for the average person is not running, but instead the stairclimber, especially taking 2 steps at a time. It combines an excellent cardiovascular workout while building leg muscle (by having to work against gravity) with very low impact and joint stress. Building muscle helps the body burn more fat 24 hrs/day, and helps maintain strength and therefore independence with aging. As adults we are getting weaker every day unless we are actively working to build muscle. Running will burn calories, but it is hard on many joints and is more likely to break down muscle than to build it.

Focus on weight-bearing exercises with functional movements, promoting balance and helping prevent osteoporosis. Core strength is extremely important for all of us for many reasons. Emphasize the eccentric (muscle lengthening) phase of any type of weight lifting by taking about 4-5 times as long to lower the weight as to lift it. This gives even better results with using less weight, reducing injuries and actually stimulating tendon healing. Keep in mind that stretching right before exercise has consistently been shown NOT to prevent injuries. A gradual warmup is much more important, and then stretch either during or after your workout when it is much more effective.”

Bryan R. Mayol, MD

Sports Medicine