I saw a patient in pain today– having been her doctor for the last 6 years.  I have watched her downward spiral into depression and chronic pain. My empathy overwhelmed me and I had her come into the office today for my form of a “Come to Jesus” intervention. Now in retrospect,  I feel my conversation was dead on arrival.
I’ve met many a soul that are so beaten down by the things that are out of their control, that they have given up and lost the insight into the situation. I’ve been there more times than I care to remember. Somehow, I have managed to pull myself out of the vicious cycle of pity and sef despair. I’m embarrassed to admit that the process has taken way too long to evolve in the past. Usually, a song, a person, or a self reflective moment in a state of fatigue has been the eye opener. I’m not sure she heard anything I said today, but I pray that she will trust that there are angels on earth, placed here to help us gain insight. God only knows that I’m no angel.  I do however have kindness as my king. On the opposite hand, I then saw a patient that is neglecting her own health out of fear and self abuse. She did hear my message thankfully.  She is someone who just needs to believe that there are some people in the world who still care. Every inkling of her being wants to pursue her dreams in lack of ignorant judgement. A very wise soul (my daughter, Ciara) recently told me a message that I will forever try to remember and maintain.  “I’ve learned that you can’t ever judge or shut someone out of your life until you have taken the time to hear their story. Sage like words from an 18 year old girl.   If you don’t want to be judged, then judge others less. We all say we don’t judge but I’m not sure that is really true. I am starting with the man in the mirror, because the best way to reboot your life and change the fallacy in the world is to change yourself.